No panda news today

Very slow pandology news day, so here are other bits of distraction that needed to be blogged. obviously.

Don't fuhgeddabout it
I (and probably 100 million or so other cable subscribers) have stubbornly held onto our HBO subscriptions for far too long, waiting with baited breath, for Sunday night -- we'll just call it SEASON SIX. The wait had better be worth it. It can't possibly live up to its own standard. Can it?

Alas, at least HBO gets off to a good start. In the way of a Season Five recap, HBO offers a cool interactive map to whet yous'es (sp?) appetites for guns, bloodshed, and a whole lotta fucking cursing. Also, the map utilizes Google satellite images so if you know anyone who actually lives in NJ/NY (not just your TV friends) you can zoom in on their house. Airs Sundays at 9, on HBO.

You could be the next Douchebag!
Speaking of Season five, NBC aired episode 2 of the most unremarkable season five of The Apprentice to date. (If you missed it, don't bother. It was a snoozefest, despite the "dual firing".)

I'm tired of season five already! If anyone knows someone who would make a good mini-Don (can say "yer fia-hed" and combs their hair waaaay over), download an application here, and send it, along with your audition, to NBC. Or bring it with you to one of several nationwide casting calls. Calls are being held the DC area on Friday, April 7, 2006. (But why at the Mercedes dealership on S. Pickett? If this is yet another example of product placement on this show, I'm going to jam a Gilette Fusion razor into someone's eye!) If applying by mail, act fast: deadline is Thursday March 9, 2006 and the Donald doesn't like to be kept waiting.

Is climbing mountains, rather than corporate ladders, more your speed? Well too bad! Better luck next season

Deadline to apply for the next season of Amazing Race has already passed. Airs Tuesdays @ 9, on CBS.
Deadline to apply for the next season of Survivor has also already passed. Airs Thursdays @ 8, on CBS.

Poop. Ah well, i resign myself to at least one more season of living vicariously through the foibles of other deranged folks.